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Hi people!
Sunday, March 31, 2013 | 12:14 AM | 0 comments

i'm such a bad blogger, haha after a very long hiatus, so here i am!
so many things left unsaid. blog is such a good place to visit, to put some memories that i want to keep, or maybe i just want to share it. 
i'm 17th now.
everythings changed, but for me that's ok. i've realized that i couldn't ask for more. 
the joy inside of the jar is,
i've found that deer is such a cute creature that live on the earth! 
well, my sister and I run a little business that put a deer as it main logo. 
so if you want, please follow us on instagram.
for makeup : @theurbanmakeup
for random stuffs: @theurbandeer

Thank you, much love!

Saturday, April 14, 2012 | 1:41 AM | 0 comments

I do believe that the real doctor had a God hand.
I don't know why lately even a doctor could inspire me a lot, i was a young wanderer, i mean i couldn't find my passion for my lifetime.

I fall for Hanyu, but i can't be as good as another real native speaker, mine was (tooooo) so-so.
How about another thing? crap, i'm not good at anything. sometimes i got a feeling where i could being replaced easily, a girl without any skill at anything, i'm not talented, and i can't find my passion at anything, bzzzzz.

and as always, senior high bring me so many things that even words couldn't describe. i'm tired, confused, stuck in the edge. and my mind blowwwssssss rite now.
actually, i'm not too busy, but i just don't know why i couldn't enjoy my teenage life as well as when i was in junior high.
the problem is people changed, they can't appreciate little things & just be grateful with what they've got, include me, i can't believe the fact that i've changed, and my mind do say "Ugh this is not what i used to be". and it kinda sucks. suxxxxxx!

anyway, i often exaggerating my life lately ._. #toodesperate #totallydepressed
and i fall for coldplay, especially the song titled "Fix You" (sebenarnya lagu yang sudah lumayan lama tapi cocok sekali)
this part!!
When you try your best, but you don't succeed When you get what you want, but not what you need When you feel so tired, but you can't sleep Stuck in reverse And the tears come streaming down your face When you lose something you can't replace When you love someone, but it goes to waste Could it be worse?

SERIOUSLY DESPERATE HIKS. take meeee away from hereeeee~
tell me fellasssss, where i could find my destination to replace this silliness?
i should find my own destination, something that can make me stay, &surviveeeeee!

ah ga enak liriknya setengah2, ini deh full part nya

When you try your best, but you don't succeed
When you get what you want, but not what you need
When you feel so tired, but you can't sleep
Stuck in reverse

And the tears come streaming down your face
When you lose something you can't replace
When you love someone, but it goes to waste
Could it be worse?

Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you

And high up above or down below
When you're too in love to let it go
But if you never try you'll never know
Just what you're worth

Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you

Tears stream down on your face
When you lose something you cannot replace
Tears stream down on your face
And I...

Tears stream down on your face
I promise you I will learn from my mistakes
Tears stream down on your face
And I...

Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you
Fix You - Coldplay

Wish i had a godhand. 1 pair of godhand.....

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Through This, I Feel The Beauty
Thursday, April 12, 2012 | 7:00 PM | 0 comments

My passion for fashion is getting fade, but the colors take that thing away,and Gichella Artmize (one of the gorgeous people in this world) make me admiring the Janec Cov. They spread the passion of fashion through dance. Howwww lovelyyyy. Unfortunately there's no good photo, just 1 weird photo that i've got from newsletter -_________-

1 of statement that i took from Alanya's Blog: "poem give you inspiration, and it will cheer up your day, and your fashion sense gonna light up your own world".

Who's Marge Piercy?
an American poet, novelist, and social activist. She is the author of the New York Times bestseller Gone to Soldiers, a sweeping historical novel set during World War II.
Was born in Detroit, Michigan, to a family deeply affected by the Great Depression. She was the first in her family to attend college, studying at the University of Michigan. Winning a Hopwood Award for Poetry and Fiction (1957) enabled her to finish college and spend some time in France, and her formal schooling ended with an M.A. from Northwestern University. Her first book of poems, Breaking Camp, was published in 1968. (source: Poem Hunter)

Social activist, Marge Piercy
Colors Passing Through Us
by Marge Piercy
Purple as tulips in May, mauve
into lush velvet, purple
as the stain blackberries leave
on the lips, on the hands,
the purple of ripe grapes
sunlit and warm as flesh.
Every day I will give you a color,
like a new flower in a bud vase
on your desk. Every day
I will paint you, as women
color each other with henna
on hands and on feet.

Red as henna, as cinnamon,
as coals after the fire is banked,
the cardinal in the feeder,
the roses tumbling on the arbor
their weight bending the wood
the red of the syrup I make from petals.

Orange as the perfumed fruit
hanging their globes on the glossy tree,
orange as pumpkins in the field,
orange as butterflyweed and the monarchs
who come to eat it, orange as my
cat running lithe through the high grass.

Yellow as a goat's wise and wicked eyes,
yellow as a hill of daffodils,
yellow as dandelions by the highway,
yellow as butter and egg yolks,
yellow as a school bus stopping you,
yellow as a slicker in a downpour.

Here is my bouquet, here is a sing
song of all the things you make
me think of, here is oblique
praise for the height and depth
of you and the width too.
Here is my box of new crayons at your feet.

Green as mint jelly, green
as a frog on a lily pad twanging,
the green of cos lettuce upright
about to bolt into opulent towers,
green as Grand Chartreuse in a clear
glass, green as wine bottles.

Blue as cornflowers, delphiniums,
bachelors' buttons. Blue as Roquefort,
blue as Saga. Blue as still water.
Blue as the eyes of a Siamese cat.
Blue as shadows on new snow, as a spring
azure sipping from a puddle on the blacktop.

Cobalt as the midnight sky
when day has gone without a trace
and we lie in each other's arms
eyes shut and fingers open
and all the colors of the world
pass through our bodies like strings of fire.

Feel the beauty!

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I've ended my first semester!
Thursday, January 12, 2012 | 2:40 AM | 0 comments

seems like this is my first post since my longest holiday ever. my first semester was good. maybe this is what the people often say. T-e-r-b-i-a-s-a.
i know that i've been died more than 100 times in senior high because of the school's tasks, school's rules, and school's exams (lebay).
you know that sometimes what ruin my mood is the little things that bother me a lot.

#Monthly Period
there's too many shit that i should face in my life. like MONTHLY PERIOD. asdfghjkl.
and this shitty monthly period just don't know the right time to come and go. when i'm having my busiest week, suddenly..... HERE COMES THE MONTHLY PERIOD HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HIKS #frustated. ok, the stomachache never last so long, but still... on the first day of m, i feel like there's a big earthquake around my belly. and that's sucks. screw youuuuu monthly period!!

#School's Tasks
don't chu know that i've got too much shits in the previous week and THIS WEEK TOO? okay ma'am. bye.

#Having a bad time in examination
wow. this is not good. i. cant. explain. this. hiks.

#exhausting days
you know that if you're a part of student in senior high, you will always feel at least 12 month in a year of exhausting days (i mean that setiap hari pasti gitu zzzzzzzzzz)

come and go in the wrong time. you. are. stupid.

dying without permission
Thursday, December 8, 2011 | 1:22 AM | 0 comments

yoooooooooooooo this is senior high! i love my friends, but honestly, i still can't find the comfortable place here, and still wondering how and what i'll do for surviving my life here for about 3 years? that's unanswered question :|
that's true, wake up dinda, welcome to senior high! forget the past for a while, or you might be hurted! well, drawing doodles in my hand was one of my favorite things to do when i'm bored as hell in the class :p


arjun (the class leader :p), gek ita, and me
and webcaming is my second favorite things when i feel "i do need something to get over those shitty assignments!"
and making doodles all over my pages and ruin all the books also my favorite things to do when i know there's nothing could help me to escape from the bad score, doomsday, and whatsoever.

life's good when it still morning. but in senior high, when the sun goes down, and when the days are Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, i'm messed up.
seeing lovely things in the school could boost my mood anyway :3

this is one of my mood's crusher. X.3's hell board. in every week we celebrate the hell day. it must be at least one day that filled up with some exams, if there's no exam in a week, it's just strange, and just tighten your belts, because that's mean in the next week, the hell board will be fully filled with exams :(

but, after i passed my first semester here, i just feel this way. (look at the picture above)

but still, i should be grateful.. My Lord blessed my life in his own way, and that's just enough to protect me from all of bad things that might happen in my life :)

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counting the ways to back
| 1:07 AM | 0 comments


IXA, you're the greatest!
too much memories, and the photos are already to explode! haha


those photos above describes about my last birthday in junior high. i hope i could find my joy in senior high,i wisssssshhhhhhhh!

| 12:57 AM | 0 comments

Wow, it's kinda late to say happy birthday for her in this blog, but who cares? i just wanna say happy birthday again for you my soul sisterrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!
i can't describes how much my love for you, but you don't need to worry ta, aku sayangggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggg bgt sm kamu :*****************
much love!

still remember? this is you, ta, when you were on junior high :D

well.. you should know that in 28th of november 2011 i've passed my first final examination, but i still stayed up at night and made this one for you weeeeeeeeeeeeeeee dodol

you should know that sometimes too much memories could hurt you to the core, because missing you was one of my hardest part in senior high, taaaaaaaaaaaa! :p

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Home is where the family is!
| 12:39 AM | 0 comments

my family owned dogs in my another house that's located in ubud.
they were really really lovely and attractive. There's a strong mom behind those cute puppies, we named her Brenda. she has been married twice. the first, she was married with pure golden retriever named Billy (we've lost him for about 6months ago, and it quite sad knowing that he's gone away). and then, for the second time, she was married with pure golden retriever. BUT THE PUPPIES ARE BLACK AT ALL, this is quite surprising, because the mother and the father weren't black at all.. i don't know but hey, they still cute, and i never thought that we've owned these cute dogs! :3


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Currently addicted with HANYUUUUU
| 12:25 AM | 0 comments

i don't know why, but hanyu drives meee crazy! *this is not chinese, this is mandarin - hm apa bedanya ya.. ya pokoknya beda*
i can't give valuable reasons, but there's something that could make me stay up late just for learning hanyu, but i know i'm an amateur, and it's been 5months since i took a course) and i took the monday & saturday schedule! whoa, you know that in the monday i come from school in the 6:00 PM, and the course started in about 6:30, for the first time, this was totally made me exhausted..
i just don't know why i can't stop this activity.. even if it's sometimes bring me down (because i can't study / prepare for tomorrow's exam and i must stay up late for make my homework), i know that this is out of normal. y'guys should know that i was quite normal when i was in junior high, but when the freshman year came, the craziness started.. i rarely hanging out, i rarely playing games, and... start doing these craziness. there's no valuable reason for those crazy stuffs that i've been done!
oh, wait..
there's only one valuable reason; maybe i was there for make my parents proud. there's no word "someday", and i hope today, tomorrow, and whatever life brings, i could make my parents smile and talk to their friends "I'm proud of her. How gifted i am"
maybe... just that.

a simple and short dialogue :D

some songs lyrics, written in hanzi and pinyin.

my name written in the hanzi :D how lovelyyyy, my hanyu's name is su mei mei :)

i wish i could own one a dictionary like this. i should look up in online store, or SG D: